


Plagg Gives Adrien the Talk

by sagansjagger



Series: Sex Education: Kwami Style [1]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Bad Parent Gabriel Agreste, F/M, Kwami Shenanigans, Sex Education, Sex Talk, comprehensive discussion of sex organs, detailed conversation regarding sex organs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:27:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24145861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sagansjagger/pseuds/sagansjagger
Summary: When Chat smells blood on Ladybug during an akuma battle, he panics. While he wouldn't put it past her to fight while injured, he desperately wants to know what she's hiding from him.Unable to dodge the issue, she admits that she's on her period.To her horror, Chat replies, "You're on your what?"Later, because Ladybug didn't explain, Plagg does.Based on a prompt by Reyemile.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Plagg
Series: Sex Education: Kwami Style [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1744090
Comments: 107
Kudos: 269





	Plagg Gives Adrien the Talk

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Reyemile](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reyemile/gifts).



> If you're new to sex education and are looking for accurate resources, try [Scarleteen.com](https://www.scarleteen.com/). 
> 
> Please note that the views expressed in the series are not meant to reflect my views on or advice regarding sex/puberty.
> 
> Thanks for reading!

Lucky Charm. Cataclysm. Pound it.

These were the elements of a healthy, successful akuma battle.

Panic was not.

But Chat couldn’t help panicking that morning as he and Ladybug freed an akuma victim. A stone took up residence behind his breastbone, a stone which he only realized later was his pounding heart. Despite the suit regulating his body temperature, his palms sweated. And he bit his lower lip repeatedly, scraping his teeth against the skin until his flesh felt kiss-swollen.

His lady was _hurt_. And fighting while injured. Chat had smelled the copper tang of blood as soon as he’d landed on the roof nearby the Montparnasse Tower, an odor so strong to his newly-enhanced nose, it almost coated his mouth. He’d gagged as he caught the scent on the wind. 

But consummate professional though she was, Ladybug didn’t act like damaged goods. She gave away nothing--no stiffness, no visible bleeding, no sign that she was aching at all aside from a twist of the lips which could be explained by a grimace of distaste at the akuma. Nothing that would have Hawkmoth suspect she was battling at less than her best.

So when she offered Chat a fistbump and a smile, he hesitated. Her gaze faltered. “Chat?” she said, tilting her head. Her hair ribbons bounced with the motion. “What’s wrong?”

Chat itched to embrace her. His skin crawled and his heart leapt into his throat. “Ladybug,” he croaked around his organs being in the wrong place. He took her by the shoulders and forced her to look at him, akuma victim and chirping ring alike forgotten. “I want you to be honest with me.”

“Okay,” she said, her hands coming up to grasp at his wrists. “What do you need?”

“Where are you injured? I smell blood.”

She stared at him, seemingly puzzled for a moment. Then her eyes filled with unadulterated horror. “Chat, I can’t…”

“Tell me, Ladybug,” Chat said, feeling his eyes tighten. She was stonewalling him. Again. He wanted to cry. “Why were you fighting while bleeding? And where are you hurt?”

“I… I really don’t want to…”

“Please. Please don’t shut me out,” Chat said, squeezing her shoulders in his clawed hands.  
Her suit didn’t give under the pressure of his claws digging into them. Her earrings chirped for the second time, followed by his ring. “You promised you’d be honest.”

Ladybug started. She gulped. “Okay. I’ll tell you.”

She leaned forward, presumably to impart some secret to his ear. The scent was even stronger with their close proximity. He stooped; due to a Spring growth spurt, he was two heads taller than her now. 

“I’m on my period,” she whispered.

“What?” Chat said, blinking.

“I’m on my period,” Ladybug said, a little louder, tugging him closer by a hand on his shoulder.

“What?” Chat said again.

“Excuse me,” the akuma victim said. They both ignored him.

“I’m on my period!” Ladybug said, making Chat wince.

Chat stuck a finger in his ear, twisted it, and pulled it out again. “You’re on your what?”

Her eyes filled with horror for the second time in three minutes. Her earrings and his ring chirped again. “You don’t know what a period is?” she said, bringing her hands up to cover her mouth. She sounded scandalized. Chat wondered how big this period thing really was.

“Excuse me,” the victim said again. “How did I get up onto the roof?”

“Chat, I, uh, I have to bug out--can you take care of the victim for me--okay, thanks, bye!” Ladybug said, already whipping her yo-yo off the roof to snag on the outcropping of a nearby building. With the _ziiiip_ of the cable catching, she leapt off the roof and was gone.

Chat was so confused. First by whatever a period was, and secondly by how important it seemed to be to Ladybug to _not_ tell him. Thoughts churning in his head, he absentmindedly helped the victim off the roof and ‘bugged out’ himself.

Later, Adrien paced on the floor of his room, still lost in thought. “I smelled blood on her, Plagg! Was she injured? Why wouldn’t she tell me what her period was?”

Plagg snarfed down his second wedge of camembert and flew off towards the cheese cabinet, presumably to retrieve a third. _Little glutton,_ Adrien thought.

“I don’t know,” Plagg admitted once he returned, a triangular prize held aloft in his tiny flippers. “Does it matter?”

“Yes, Plagg!” Adrien said, stopping his movements to face his kwami. “If she doesn’t tell me what’s wrong with her, then I’ll… I’ll be so worried!”

Plagg stuffed the stinky cheese in his mouth and spoke as he chewed. “There’s nothing wrong with a period.”

“You know what a period is?” 

Plagg looked shifty. “It’s part of a queen’s reproductive system.”

‘Queen’s’ made Adrien think of Queen Bee. Thinking about Ladybug and the fact that she even had a reproductive system made him feel lewd. He didn’t want to think about Chloe’s. 

“And?” Adrien said, crossing to his desk and opening his printer to retrieve a piece of paper. If Plagg was going to explain, Adrien was going to take notes. 

“You’re a fourteen-year-old boy. You should know this stuff already!” Plagg whined, waving his tiny flippers. “Can’t you ask your father?”

Adrien blanched, turning to his kwami. “Can you imagine _Gabriel Agreste_ teaching me about queens’ reproductive systems?” the boy said, and then deepened his voice. “‘Son. The world of women is a poorly-researched, uncharted territory. You should look this up on the internet because I just cannot do this right now.’”

Plagg cackled. “You’re right, his head would explode. And you definitely shouldn’t look this up on the internet.”

Adrien turned back to his desk and pulled a pen out of his pen cup. “So you’ll teach me?”

Plagg stared at him. “I need more cheese.” He flew off. 

Adrien wasn’t sure if Plagg was returning to impart the truth to him or not, so he found a hard book-- _Moby Dick, go figure_ , Adrien thought--and crossed to his bed. He sat down cross-legged on the mattress and waited for Plagg.

Book, paper, and pen in Adrien’s lap, he wrote a heading down: _Queens’ Reproductive Systems--How do they work??_ He underlined it for good measure.

Camembert in hand, Plagg flew back to Adrien. “Okay, so, every twenty-eight days or so, ladies shed their uterine lining--”

“Uterine?”

Plagg sighed explosively, which was no less dramatic for being tiny. Adrien decided not to interrupt him anymore. “It’s from an organ called the uterus, just go with it.” 

“Okay. Sorry.”

Plagg paused, tilting his head, and then apparently decided to change tacks. “Females have organs that males do not. One of those organs is the uterus. It’s where they hold babies when they get pregnant.”

“Oh,” Adrien said, furiously scribbling down notes. _Uteruses hold babies_ , he wrote, among other things. “That’s weird.”

Plagg snarfed down his cheese in one bite. “Isn’t it?” he said as he chewed. “Now, every month, the queen’s uterus prepares to have a baby. The lining gets thick. But if they don’t get pregnant, then that lining has to be shed. That’s called a period.” 

“Huh, okay,” Adrien said, making another couple of notes. “I guess that makes sense.”

“Yeah,” Plagg said, folding his tiny arms. “Most of the lining is absorbed back into the body. But sometimes, a little of it leaks out as blood. That’s probably what you smelled from Ladybug.”

Relief flooded Adrien’s system. His Lady wasn’t injured after all! He smiled at Plagg. “Thank you for telling me.”

“I’m not done,” Plagg said, placing a small flipper on his huge, bulbous head. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but in for a penny, in for a pound. You’re fourteen. You need to know this stuff.”

Adrien shifted positions on the bed so he was more comfortable, spreading one of his legs out in front of him. Now that he was sure Ladybug wasn’t hurting, he could relax and enjoy the Talk. “Okay. I’m ready.”

“So the monthly cycle is called estrus, or more commonly, being in heat,” Plagg said, floating over to perch on Adrien’s pillow. Adrien turned to him. “Ladies are polyestrous breeders, which means they go into heat multiple times in a year, typically during October through February.”

“What happens during a heat?”

“I’m getting there, keep your pants on,” Plagg said, snorting. “The first heat cycle is during puberty. A queen can get pregnant during any of her heat cycles, including the first one. She’s usually in heat for about a week, and then she’ll go out of it for a week, and then the cycle repeats.”

“So a queen is in heat about half the time during the season?” Adrien said, writing that down. 

Plagg looked like he was giving him fingerguns without any fingers. “You got it. I always knew you were smart.”

Adrien basked in the praise, wrapping it around him like a cotton blanket. He smiled down at Plagg. “So what happens during a heat?”

Plagg’s huge, green eyes were shifty again. “Well, uh,” he said, and cleared his throat. “Behavioral changes, mostly. She’ll start yowling and demanding attention. She’ll roll on the floor. She’ll beg to go outside and rub her face on things. Also, she’ll be super affectionate.”

"Why doesn’t Ladybug respond to my attention? She’s not super affectionate with me, and she’s clearly in heat.”

Plagg waved his tiny arms again. “Maybe she has an iron will?”

“That would make sense.” 

“When a lady is in heat, it’s important to keep her calm,” Plagg said. “She may have extra stress and anxiety, because she’s at the mercy of her hormones. Heat is a nasty cycle sometimes.”

Finally, something Adrien could do for his Lady. “How do I keep her calm?”

“Petting, brushing her fur, giving her attention. Some queens prefer exercise,” Plagg said, nodding sagely. “But every queen is different. Some females like to hide when they’re anxious. Providing a safe space to let her burn off her energy and not probing when there’s a problem are ways you can help.”

Adrien clenched a fist. “I can do that. Ladybug sounds like a hider.”

“Undoubtedly. So there’s more to this. Queens are known as induced-ovulators,” Plagg said, and continued to speak when Adrien gave him a blank look. “The act of mating causes an egg to go to the uterus from the ovaries, which are another organ that females have that males do not. Every time a queen copulates during her heat cycle, an egg is traveling to her uterus to meet the male’s sperm.”

“That sounds very technical,” Adrien said, tilting his head. “What’s a sperm?”

“A sperm is the male’s counterpart to the egg,” Plagg said, bringing his flippers together. “When the sperm and the egg meet, that makes a kitten, in time, if the fertilized egg attaches to the uterine lining.”

Adrien’s pen made a _scritch-scritch_ sound as he took down more notes. “I see.”

“During pregnancy, heat cycles cease,” Plagg said, holding up a flipper. “She’ll probably get ‘morning sickness,’ which means she pukes up some of her food.”

“Poor queens,” Adrien said, wilting.

“I know, right? Males don’t have any of this. We just contribute sperm,” Plagg said mournfully. “Anyway, there’s a lot that goes on in pregnancy. Her appetite increases. Somewhere around the fifth week, her abdomen will start to swell, and will continue to swell throughout the pregnancy.”

Adrien nodded silently, so Plagg continued. “Many pregnant queens will sleep a lot more during pregnancy. They need their sleep during this time, so don’t interrupt. And she’ll be super affectionate, too, so by all means, give her the attention she craves. She’s working hard. She deserves your love and time.”

“I can do that,” Adrien said, hanging on to every word Plagg spoke.

“And that’s about it,” Plagg said, shrugging. He floated up to Adrien and booped him on the nose. “Any questions?”

Adrien stared down at his list of notes. “How does the sperm get to the egg?”

Plagg groaned. “I was hoping you wouldn’t ask that,” he said, and pressed his flippers together in front of him. “So the female genital tract consists of the vulva, vagina, cervix, uterus, oviducts, and ovaries. We’ve already covered ovaries and uteri. The oviducts are the tubes that transport the eggs.”

“And the other stuff?”

“The vulva is the female’s entrance to her body,” Plagg said, without pausing for breath. “The vagina is a muscular tube that connects the cervix--the opening to the uterus--to the vulva.”

“Again, very technical,” Adrien said, making more notes.

“In males, the genital tract involves the testes, the penis, and the prostate,” Plagg said, a serious look on his face. ”Testes, or testicles, are where the sperm is made and stores. The penis transports the sperm to the vulva. The prostate is an accessory sex gland, which creates the fluid portion of the semen--sperm and fluid.”

Adrien bit his already sore lip. Plagg had said the word ‘sex’ for the first time in the conversation, and Adrien wasn’t sure how he felt about that. “So the penis... enters the vulva and… sprays, uh, semen into the vagina? Which is then brought to the uterus, where it fertilizes an egg?”

“Good job, Adrien, you got it,” Plagg said, applauding. 

“These are, um, sensitive organs. Doesn’t that hurt?”

“Uh,” Plagg said, working his mouth for a little bit. “No? It actually feels really good.”

“Oh,” Adrien said, feeling uncomfortably hot. He coughed into his fist.

“So, any more questions?” Plagg asked quickly, hovering up near Adrien’s face.

Despite the rush of embarrassment the conversation had brought, Adrien smiled at his kwami. “I think you covered everything. Thanks, Plagg.”

“Anytime, Kid. Anytime.”

***

“I’m impressed by your ability to control it, Ladybug,” Chat said, arriving at the roof of their meeting place with a rubbery thump. The day was Tuesday, and he’d been looking forward to this particular patrol all week. 

“Control what?” she said, straightening from the railing she’d been leaning on. She still smelled faintly of blood, but now that Chat knew the monthly cycle was just a natural part of her, the scent didn't bother him.

“Your period,” Chat said, shrugging. By her slightly furrowed brow, he knew that he’d lost her. “Your heat?”

“My _what_?” 

“Your heat,” Chat said, feeling the warmth of embarrassment on the exposed parts of his face. He hadn’t intended to discuss this subject with her so soon, but with an opening like that… He did not think this through. “You know, estrus? Your monthly cycle of, um... you know?”

Oh, this was a mistake. Chat knew it, looking at the hunch of her shoulders and the baffled, embarrassed look she was giving him.

But then Ladybug did something he did not expect.

She cracked up.

Ladybug threw her head back and laughed, clutching her belly. 

“Hahaha,” he said, trying to laugh with her. “Ha? What’s so funny?”

“W-Who told you about heats?” Ladybug said through her giggle-induced tears. She scrubbed at her face with her hands.

Chat didn’t know if she was amused or upset. His feline ears flattened. “Plagg?”

“Ha!” Ladybug said, staggering forward and catching herself on his shoulder. She continued to cackle, only calming down when he cupped her cheeks in his clawed hands and stared deep into her eyes. He used the pads of his fingers so he wouldn’t poke her. 

Based on the good humor swimming in her eyes, Chat decided she was delighted rather than sad. His lips quirked. “I’m glad you find this funny. I wouldn’t, in your position. The queen’s--”

“Queen’s? Hahaha!”

“--reproductive system is very complex, and yeah, a little embarrassing,” Chat finished. 

“Oh, Chat,” Ladybug said, smiling up at him. Her hands came up to grasp his wrists. Her eyes shone. “I’m glad we have some time, because we have to talk…”

“I have all the time in the world for you, Ladybug,” Chat said, brushing his lips against her forehead. “What do you want to tell me?”

“About a little something often called ‘the birds and the bees,’” Ladybug said, starting to glow cherry-red under her mask. Chat thought her smile was brilliant, all white teeth and mirthfulness. “I still can’t believe you don’t know this yet. Now sit down. It’s going to be a long night.”

**Author's Note:**

> Are you interested in reading or writing fanfiction? Are you looking for a community of like-minded and supportive people? Then join the [Miraculous Fanworks](https://discord.gg/mlfanworks) Discord server! 
> 
> We are always welcoming new members, and would love to see you. We offer a variety of conversations, from fic discussions to writing support to fanfiction prompts. We even have monthly server-wide events and group writing projects! 
> 
> Come join today!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Kwami Swap: Sex EduCATion Style](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24306388) by [LuthienErchamion](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LuthienErchamion/pseuds/LuthienErchamion)




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